


How our bodies born to heal become so prone to die

by ScarletQuake



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Trailer, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Character Death, Depressed Steve Rogers, Feels, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt Steve Rogers, I am so sorry, Idiots in Love, M/M, Not A Fix-It, POV Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, This is NOT an infinity war fix it!, at least not as shit as the ending of infinity war imo, but still really freaking sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-28 09:56:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14446779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScarletQuake/pseuds/ScarletQuake
Summary: After everything he's been through in the last couple of years, Steve Rogers is tired. But once a threat that could destroy the universe emerges, he still feels the need to protect his friends, even though he has a bad feeling about it...





	How our bodies born to heal become so prone to die

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: For anyone who hasn't seen Infinity War yet, this isn't the ending of the actual movie. But since I had certain expectations that didn't come true I thought it'd be a waste not to do anything with all the damn time I put into theories and emotional preparation. So here's a twist, a different way of what could've happened at the end. Also i'm an emotionall mess and my Stucky heart is bleeding, send help.

It’s safe to say that Steve is nervous.

Even though he hides it so well, he’s terrified.

After learning about Thanos and what kind of a threat he was, Steve and the others decided that they had to remove the mind stone from Vision’s head, as dangerous as it is.

To Steve, Shuri was one of the few people who could actually do it.

And so their trip to Wakanda began…

 

* * *

 

 

As they get closer to Wakanda, Steve starts to think about Bucky.

He can’t help but wonder how he’s doing in this foreign country.

Is he free of the mind triggers Hydra put in him? What do the people think of him? Does he ever think of him?

He swallows at that last thought, not really thinking that Bucky would think of him.

Even though Bucky wasn’t the winter soldier anymore, there was a distance between them. And while Steve hopes that it will get better, he’s also terrified that it won’t.

When the doors of the Quinjet open, Steve and Natasha are the first ones who walk out.

Steve puts up a smile for T’Challa, thanking him once again.

And then he hears a familiar voice.

When Bucky walks up to them, Steve freezes. He looks at Bucky in awe and a bit shocked.

Bucky was looking so..good. He looked healthy and god, he was even smiling at him. That exact same old grin he used to have...

Before Steve can blink, he has his arms wrapped around Bucky, hugging him tightly. Even though Bucky is smiling, he pulls Steve away more quickly than Steve would’ve hoped. But he’s not gonna think about that.

Right now, Steve can only focus on the positive, he can only focus on the fact that he has his best friend back.

“How have you been, Buck?” he blurts out, smiling fondly at Bucky.

Bucky shrugs.

“Not bad, for the end of the world.”

 

* * *

 

 

As Shuri and Bruce are trying to figure out how to remove the mind stone from Vision, Steve watches from a distance, trying to pay attention but failing.

He can feel the Wakandan sun on his back, shining through the window.

He turns around to look outside.

First, he sees a few members of the Dora Milaje and other warriors preparing for the battle that is about to come.

Then, his eyes fall on Bucky.

He’s standing there with a few other people, laughing and smiling.

Steve feels a pang in his chest. He never thought he’d see him like this again, smiling and cracking jokes again.

Steve can tell that whatever Shuri did has actually worked.

He knows Bucky has a lot of healing to do, but at least he’s himself again, free of any strings Hydra had wrapped around him.

It’s that moment that Steve realizes that Bucky really has built a life for himself in Wakanda, but Steve’s not a part of it.

His heart aches at the realisation.

 

“Captain?” he hears behind him, coming from T’Challa.

He turns around and looks at him questioningly.

For a moment, he thinks that T’Challa will ask him if he’s alright, or if there’s something wrong. But that question doesn’t come.

“We should go now.” T’Challa tells him instead. Steve gives a small nod, knowing that the battle is about to start.

 

* * *

 

 

 When they walk outside, Steve sees Bucky and doesn't hesitate to approach him.

He has this feeling in his gut, a feeling he hadn’t had in a long time. That's why it was important that he could at least talk to Bucky before the battle would begin.

Bucky’s smile seems to fade a little when Steve approaches him and actually looks away a little, as if he doesn’t want Steve to approach him.

Still, Steve walks up to him with a small smile.

“Hey Buck.”he starts off a bit awkwardly, not really knowing how to start.

Bucky looks at him a bit confused. “Hey.” He says before a small frown appears on his face. “What’s the matter?”

Steve bites his lip. There’s so much he wants to tell Bucky, but there’s barely any time.

He ends up speaking before thinking about what he wants to say.

“I just..I know fighting another war is probably the last thing you’d want right now, and it’s okay if you sit this one out.” He quickly blurts out before letting out a deep sigh, remembering what he wants to tell Bucky.

“But I need you to know that..I’m proud of you. I really am. You’ve been through hell and to see you healing from it..” Steve couldn’t help but smile a little as he said it. “I just felt like it was important to tell you.”

Bucky looks like he doesn’t know what to say for a moment.

Eventually, he gives a small nod.

“Doesn’t matter if I like it or not, we’ve got a world to protect.” He simply says, offering a small smile as he cocks his gun.

“We should go.” He adds.

Steve blinks. It’s almost as if there’s something Bucky is keeping from him as well. Or is that just his imaginaton?

He nods and leaves with Bucky and the others towards the Wakandan battlefield.

 

* * *

 

 

 For just a second, he thinks that he’s gonna make it...

 

 

Thanos is trying to crush him into the ground, but he resists.

He fights back, just like he’s done his whole life.

He’d been in so many fights. Before the serum he was fighting any possible illness that he had. After that there were the bullies in Brooklyn.

Then came the bigger threats. Nazi’s, the Red Skull, aliens from outer space and Ultron in Sokovia. So far, this was the biggest threat.

It was nearly impossible to defeat Thanos but here he was, trying to fight off the purple titan.

And for just a second he thinks that he’ll defeat him.

Until he doesn’t…

 

 

 

He faintly hears a scream, a female one, probably Wanda but he’s not sure. He just hopes she and Vision are okay.

Then, he hears a second scream.

This one was Bucky’s.

Before he can fall on the ground, he feels a pair of strong arms wrapping around him, holding him close.

He blinks, trying to see while his vision was getting more blurry.

"I'm here, Steve. 'M right here." Bucky’s voice is raw but gentle at the same time.

It reminds Steve of all those years ago in Brooklyn where he wasn't Captain America and Bucky wasn't the Winter Soldier.

He quickly shakes the thought away and looks at Bucky.

"Is Vision...is he okay? Is he safe?" He blurts out, trying not to feel the stinging pain.

It was getting harder to talk, and to breathe.

Bucky gives a small nod and that's enough for Steve.

"Steve.." Bucky eventually speaks up, looking at the gaping hole in Steve's stomach.

Steve knows that he's a goner. He might be a super soldier but this isn't something he can walk out of alive.

But then he realizes that he's in Bucky's arms.

He feels so safe and it's...

 

 

"It's okay."

He softly tells Bucky, a few tears were spilling out as he tried to convince him.

"It's okay, I...you're here, I love you." he rambles, knowing that he's running out of time.

For a moment, Bucky just stares at him, frozen. It makes Steve smile.

"You mean you..?" Bucky breathes.

Steve weakly nods.

"Always have, Buck. Deep down I think you knew."

It hurts so much to talk, but to finally admit it all to Bucky feels so relieving.

"You're the first person..I've ever loved so much. The person I'll always love." He continues, tasting the metallic taste of blood in his mouth, but it doesn't keep him from smiling at Bucky.

"I lov-I love you.." he stammers.

“Steve, please don’t…I just got you back.” Bucky cries.

Steve hasn’t seen him this emotional in a long time.

He saw how Bucky was breaking, and it was breaking his heart. He wanted Bucky to be okay.

“It’s…it’s okay, I guess this is the end of the line for me.” He slurs, feeling weaker and weaker by the moment.

He manages to touch Bucky’s cheek, a weak attempt of stroking it. 

 “I..I’m sorry, Buck. I..love..”

 

He really can’t breathe anymore. He’s shutting down and he knows that this is it.

He can’t feel Bucky anymore, all he feels is the cold.

Everything becomes so blurry, he can’t see.

 

And finally, he shuts his eyes for good and goes limp in Bucky’s arms.

 

 

 

Steven Grant Rogers is dead…


End file.
